Communication
Sarah Shuel
Change: Alter, Transform and Switch; To Become ...

: to make different in some particular : ALTER

: to make radically different : TRANSFORM

: to make a shift from one to another : SWITCH

: to become different

Ahh yes: “Alter, transform and switch, to become different’’.....these words resonate a lot in FIG’s evolution, we’re excited about a little bit of change (and a little apprehensive if we’re being honest!).

Change: Alter, Transform and Switch; To Become Different
Communication
Sarah Shuel
Technology Addiction: Yes, It's a Thing...

In her Wall Street Journal article: Digital Addictions Are Drowning Us in Dopamine, Dr, Lembke, a Stamford University professor and psychiatrist, talks about the scientific biological effects of addictions to our devices. It’s real folks. This is not FIG banging the drum of putting down our phones or any other technological apparatus and talking or connecting with our fellow human beings. No. This is concrete, physiological, measurable, science based fact that continuously interacting with our high-tech electronic leashes, gaming apparatuses and social media actually, physically, alters our brains to crave more of it, thereby de-incentivising us to engage with others on a human level.

Gasp, shock and awe!

Technology Addiction: Yes, It's a Thing...
Communication
Sarah Shuel
Mistakes: Perfectly Human

Mistakes. We all make them, we’re human beings and by definition 99.9% imperfect (with apologies to those of you who think otherwise), which results in, guess what? Mistakes (we make them hourly at FIG)! That gaffes, miscalculations and oversights are a part of our collective experience on this earth. Why (on earth!) is it so hard to admit to making mistakes, take responsibility for these human aberrations and move on after making a miscalculation or error? Hmmmm?

Mistakes: Perfectly Human
Communication
Sarah Shuel
Habits: The Good, The Bad, and the Intangible

We all have habits - some serve us well and some get in our way…...Google states: “A habit is a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.” Establishing a habit usually takes about two weeks to become routine and is subsequently supported and reinforced by practicing it daily.

Habits: The Good, The Bad, and the Intangible
Communication
Sarah Shuel
Life Happens

Ever had a “Monday” on any day of the week? Ever had your day perfectly planned, scheduled and organized only to have all your intended “to-do’s”: meetings, calls, oh yeah, actual “work,” utterly blown up by an unexpected interruption, complication, interference? Ever had someone insert themselves into your day with their drama, troubles or lack of planning (real or self-inflicted), requiring you to shelve your carefully laid out day(s) and requiring you to stop whatever you’re doing for their fire drill?

Yeah, us too.

Life Happens

Listen: Uncover the Human: Connecting with Barbara Randell on Growing Your Human Relationships Currency

Listen: Uncover the Human: Connecting with Barbara Randell on Growing Your Human Relationships Currency

Happy summer!

This week, we thought we’d mix it up a bit and give you a break from reading - and instead provide you with some interesting listening! We invite you to check out our most recent podcast, Siamo’s Uncover the Human: Connecting with Barbara Randell on Growing Your Human Relationships Currency. Randell was honored to be a part of this podcast with hosts Cristina Amigoni and Alex Cullimore. Here it is for your listing pleasure on your drive home - if you’re actually going into the office - on a lunch break, after work, or for some beach listening (lucky you!) if you’re interested in hearing a little bit about a FIG perspective.

It's True: Practice Makes Perfect

It's True: Practice Makes Perfect

Practice: Another one of those words we throw around theoretically a lot. We talk often about “practice” in this space, but we thought we’d break it down to brass tacks and talk about what it means in form and execution. Not necessarily the sexiest topic in the world, as it probably throws us back to tedious hours practing our piano scales or long hours in the hot sun at soccer practice - but it’s really really important nonetheless, especially in today’s fast-paced world, where we barely have time to think and where the expectation of immediate gratification is so rampant. That frankly odious statement, “practice makes perfect,” is in fact true - and we’re forgetting to do it with our professional relationships.

SO - why is practice so important? Well, in business, connecting, maintaining, sustaining and nurturing relationships is an indisputable necessity. Business is done because of relationships - full stop. Sadly, we have become complacent in remembering the importance of our colleagues to our businesses, deferring to connecting on social media or quick emails to stay caught up with their lives - which is a woeful substitute to actually, really and truly knowing someone. Media is one-dimensional. Humans are very very multidimensional. Letting ourselves be known can be scary, for sure! It requires some vulnerability in allowing the other to know us, and some curiosity on our part to know them: our integrity, our beliefs, what we stand for professionally, are we reliable, dependable, patient, pleasant, fun, maybe funny? Smart? Someone they’d like to do business with? Someone they feel comfortable inviting to their networks? Someone they wouldn’t hesitate to pick up the phone to refer a colleague to? If we all can agree that these relationships are important in business, then why are we talking about practice?

Rediscovering Kindness

Rediscovering Kindness

Benevolence…….We worry about the lack of kindness in our world today. We worry that we have become so accustomed to assuming the worst from our fellow humans, that we have forgotten about affection and cordiality. We worry that the belief that the intentions of our fellow humans have become so polluted with expectations of the worst possible meanings or outcomes, that we’re forgetting about tenderness, patience, altruism and gentleness. We worry that we are becoming numb to generosity, compassion, consideration, or concern for others, without expecting praise or reward, and that this standard is becoming pervasive. It’s a lot to worry about.

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Me Time...

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Me Time...

Have you ever experienced 7 day work weeks? Ever used weekends to get a jump start on preparing for the upcoming excitements of the work week ahead? Ever felt like a slacker upon receiving an email, phone call or work text on a weekend? At 6am? At 9pm? “Eeeek! Someone is working and the implied imperative to respond is too great to ignore? A colleague is busy and requires an answer right now!”

Yeah, us too.

"Problem Children:" We All Have Them (Or ARE Them!)

"Problem Children:" We All Have Them (Or ARE Them!)

Who pops to mind? We can all relate to this characterization of personalities at work otherwise the phrase wouldn’t be relatable. Right?

To begin with, please know we use this term with sincerest and genuine affection - to torture an oft-repeated theme in these offerings - there are reasons for everything: even problem children.

We ALL can be problem children - we all are in some circles.

What does it mean? Taking the time to understand each others’ sometimes differing beliefs, divergences in approaches, viewpoints, world views, intentional or unintentional biases, how we “do things,” and are we introverts or extroverts? We all bring preconceptions with us to work. But, what if our office neighbor doesn’t share them and has a completely different set of standards, work ethics and values? What if their method of communication is contrary to ours? What if their priorities contrast with ours and are peculiar to us? Do we simply label them as “problems” or do we seek to understand the nexus of the differing behavior and refocus on the task, project or directive at hand? Is it easier to put people with nutty, offbeat or painful standpoints (in our opinion!) in a simple box and label them as problem children? Easier, maybe - but does it accomplish the goals of a shared, mutually beneficial outcome (whatever that outcome may be)? Not to belabor the point: we’re human beings, folks! We don’t stop becoming humans when we become employees

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Return to Normal? Now What?

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Return to Normal? Now What?

Interesting questions, both: What is our new normal and “Now what?”

Teasing apart these queries, we happened upon this space: what are the (clearly unintended!) awarenesses and gifts our time apart during this once-in-a-century pandemic has afforded us (and yes, we believe there are some important ones)? How have we evolved in regards to perceptions, attitudes and approaches towards professional relationships? What have we learned and what can we extract from the lesson(s)? Hmmmmm, food for thought indeed.

In her article for the New York Times dated 4.23.21, Kate Murphy asserts:

“The past year has forced a mass meditation on the nature and strength of our social ties. While our culture has encouraged us to accumulate friends, both on and offline, like points, the pandemic has laid bare the distinction between quantity and quality of connections. There are those we’ve longed to see and those it’s been a relief not to see. The full reckoning will become apparent only when we can once again safely gather and invitations are — or are not — extended. Our social lives and social selves may never be the same.”

We submit for your consideration, now that things are opening up - returning to “normal” - who do we really want or need to spend time with professionally? Who is important to us and our professions? Now that we’ve had this time in relative Zoom isolation, necessitating intense intentionality with interactions (we could no longer just bump into a colleague in the lunchroom and ask a quick question), how have we prioritized communications and exchanges in a meaningful, thoughtful manner? Obviously (this is a FIG offering, after all!), consequential, relevant relationships are important, but what’s the quality of these interactions? Like it or not, we were compelled to calculate the relative importance of who we chose to engage with, what we needed to accomplish, and why we were doing so (we didn’t have much choice in the “where” question: Home office? Living room? Kitchen counter? Backyard? Ok, so we had a few choices)?

The Quest for Authenticity

The Quest for Authenticity

In her monthly newsletter for the Colorado Attorney Mentoring Program (CAMP), Ryann Peyton spoke about Essence vs. Persona: What's Informing Your Professional Identity? Around the same time FIG was invited to participate in a podcast at the end of May. It’ll be conversational about FIG’s work, but in advance, the hosts asked me to consider the concept of authenticity so this is as much an exercise for this writer as it is hopefully illuminating for you all, dear readers.

Dictionary.com defines authenticity as: “the quality of being authentic; genuineness”. What does THAT mean? How do we find and identify our authentic selves? Our unique identities?

The Evolution of Relationships

The Evolution of Relationships

What seems like 100 years ago, FIG wrote a white paper: Book of Business: What Is It and How Do I Build One? It was an article outlining strategic networking, marketing efforts, name recognition, expertise and referrals. In short: business relationships. We thought we’d take a deeper dive into this proposition and discuss the maturation cycle of professional alliances: what are some of the actual mechanics of maintaining, nurturing and sustaining these relationships and how exactly do we execute our desired goals without being transactional or mercenary?

Our Mountains: Love, Belonging, Esteem, & Self-Actualization

Our Mountains: Love, Belonging, Esteem, & Self-Actualization

In past offerings, we’ve dabbled in discussing “what do we want” in our professional lives, so we thought we’d take a deeper dive into some elements of what this truly means. It’s a little more of an existential topic than usual, but we thought we’d mix it up a bit….

In his book, The Second Mountain: The Quest for a Moral Life, the New York Times op-ed commentator, David Brooks writes: “Every so often, you meet people who radiate joy—who seem to know why they were put on this earth, who glow with a kind of inner light. Life, for these people, has often followed what we might think of as a two-mountain shape. They get out of school, they start a career, and they begin climbing the mountain they thought they were meant to climb. Their goals on this first mountain are the ones our culture endorses: to be a success, to make your mark, to experience personal happiness. But when they get to the top of that mountain, something happens. They look around and find the view . . . unsatisfying. They realize: This wasn’t my mountain after all. There’s another, bigger mountain out there that is actually my mountain……….And so they embark on a new journey. On the second mountain, life moves from self-centered to other-centered. They want the things that are truly worth wanting, not the things other people tell them to want...”

Disagreements: What to Do?

Disagreements: What to Do?

Ahhh yes, an unfortunate detail in living and working with other humans: those nettlesome disagreements. We all have them, not many of us enjoy the experience (although there are those who seem to thrive on conflict, but that’s a discussion for another day), and yet, periodic discord does in fact rear its head from time to time. Disagreements are not necessarily a bad thing, not at all. They can provide a forum to hear different points of view, distinctive, contrasting and sometimes off-beat attitudes, beliefs and worldviews which, when conducted constructively, create the potential to broaden our own minds and perceptions thus enabling us to expand our horizons and intellects. All good things. So why do so many of us avoid having healthy debates and run like our hair’s on fire to Dodge or otherwise sidestep having these kinds of exchanges?

Yep, there’s a reason (broken FIG record), and guess what they boil down to?? Feelings! Confrontations bring up all manner of feelings: discomfort, frustration, irritation, annoyance, fear, rage, blame, outrage, disdain, being attacked, not being heard, recognized, appreciated, none of which are particularly fun or associated with a positive experience. In fact, on the continuum of fun to unfun, these feelings rank pretty highly in the unfun column. But let’s dig into why, shall we?